To whom it may concern:

RE:  Burritios

Dear sir or madam,

Lately, I have been getting frustrated with the way you people tend to make burritios.  First of all.  I realize that it’s cheaper to use thinner tortillas, but come on,  you can’t get through an entire burrito without the fucking thing busting through at the end in your hand, and getting all over your lap.  Can you PLEASE start using some sturdier tortillas?  I’d like to actually get through an entire meal without having to use a god damnned fork to eat the filling, as it’s all over the wrapper.

And this brings me to my other pet peeve.  Is it too much to ask for you to teach your minimum wage teenagers to learn how to fill a freaking burrito evenly?  I’m getting tired of starting at one end, with meat and/or beans, and then getting about 2/3 of the way to the end, to find the rest is nothing but sour cream, cheese, and lettuce.  Haven’t you heard of equal distribution?  Come on now, I like sour cream, but not as the primary filling!!!  I want it across the entire length of the burritio, not as some creamy surprise at the end.  This ain’t a dick I’m sucking here, it’s a burrito.  (and no I’m not gay, I just liked the ANALogy).

Last point…can you also teach them how to wrap a burrito to not freaking fall apart before I take the first bite?  Nothing is more annoying than unwrapping the sonofabitch at delbelltacodenwhatever, and having the entire thing fall apart faster than a watts government housing project.

Am I bitter? Am I going to stop eating fast food mexican?  Nope. I like the stuff. Just please, fix the shit, ok?

Sincerely yours,

A disgruntled burrito eater.